Why Dogs Bite People
September 27, 2006
We have already opined on pet blogs, pet owners who blog and pet owners who really believe their pets also blog.
Changing kitty litter or getting your mangy dog to crap outside does not in any way constitute brilliance on your part or brilliance on the part of your pet. It is not the equivalent of teaching your child to look both ways before crossing the street. That’s right, we said it. Your animal is not an equivalent to a child. OK, so we’ve managed to offend a few of you that really do believe an animal-human relationship is the equivalent to a human-human relationship. That said, if you indeed believe that, you’re an idiot.
Writing a blog in a cat/dog/hamster/fish voice is entertaining only to yourself and that small galaxy of morons who feel the need to do the same.
If the rest of us don’t really care about what you have to say in your personal blog (trust us here, we don’t. Having a second blog written by/about a pet is a fair indicator of that), why on earth would you think we care about the imaginary conversations you have with Fluffy or Spot? If we don’t think your child learning to crap into into a porcelain bowl is riveting Pulitzer Prize material, it is a safe bet that reading about your feelings on a certain brand of kitty litter or your pet’s favorite made-in-China toy will not be adapted into a major motion picture screenplay.
If we have the uncontrollable urge to read about skeins of wool, there are knitting blogs aplenty that can calm that jonesing need, without seeing little itty bitty kittens frolicking, entagled in that skein of wool, trapped in paper bag or playing with tinsel. Those activities are not unique to your pet.
Now, these are the reasons dogs bite their owners;