Yes, We Are Bananas

May 6, 2007

(MHNN) Ann Arbor- Dr Patricia Mary Santy, former NASA fight surgeon and organic waste in space disposal specialist, has completed the world’s first inter species therapy program.

In an interview with MHNN, Santy relayed the amazing story of the soon to be published course of therapy and what prompted her to begin inter species therapy.

The interview with the author of the renowned Carnival Of The Insanities, will be published in two parts.

Speaking from her spacious cubicle at the University of Michigan Ralph Nader/Lyndon Larouche Mental Health Center, Santy noted with a certain degree of circumspection that it was most fitting that the first inter species therapy program was a University of Michigan project.

The University of Michigan has a long tradition of reaching out to minorities and others that have been traditionally disenfranchised. University policy is one of inclusiveness and healing, no matter of race, color or creed. When it was discovered that Arafat had contracted AIDS, university specialists were sent to Paris to see if they could be of any assistance in allowing Arafat to pursue his predilection for little boys and continue his intense quest for peace and interest in procuring weapons, explosives and spectacular corruption. The university administration made it quite clear that despite demands by a secret cabal of Jews and most conservatives that violence and racism end, they would not back away from the intense pressures to limit free expressions.

MHNN: What does that have to do with inter species therapy?

PMS: Everything. Apes and other simians have long been discriminated against because of their propensity for violence and rejection of the human notion of what makes up civilized behavior. It is clear they have much in common with the Palestinians.

MHNN: Surely you jest! Are you really comparing elements of the Middle East conflict to Simian cultures and behaviors?

PMS: Absolutely! In fact, there are many comparisons that can be made between simian cultures and behavior and their Arab counterparts.

MHNN: For example?

PMS: Tribal violence, males killing females they believe have had relations outside the tribe, the teaching of young simians killing skills, the absolute ruthlessness of the dominant male, and so on.

MHNN: That does sound kind of familiar. It also sounds depressing!

PMS: Look, the evidence is quite clear. The behavioral links of simians are quite well documented. The fact remains that simian behavior is closely linked to Arab world behavior. It is western behavior that is contrived. The leftists have it right. Violence, hate and an ‘anything goes’ attitude are natural and organic, if you will. It is the culture of freedom and tolerance that are unnatural.

MHNN: That doesn’t bode well for the security of Israel and Jews.

PMS: Look at this way. If the Arab world is the equivalent of the organic, natural world, then Israel and Jews represent democratic, tolerant and evolving humankind. That means they must be eradicated, for the good of nature. Let me put it this way. Jews are like polluting carbons. The time has come for us to eliminate our carbon footprint.

MHNN: That’s pretty shocking, Dr Sanity. What about the contribution of the Jews?

PMS: What about them? What is so great about contributions? Sure, we have learned much about medicine, chemistry, physics, art and so on, but so what? Where does that leave the simians? Where does that leave the Arab world? Only farther and farther behind! That’s why there is a backlash- the Jews, white societies and democracy have contributed too much. If we abandon Jews and civilization, we wouldn’t need to worry about appropriate behavior, expectations and the silly notion of ‘All men are created equal.’ Simians and Arabs know better than that! Might makes right!

MHNN: The arguments you make are compelling, in a way, but they are disturbing. If ‘might makes right,’ what is to prevent the civilized world from making permanent distinctions between themselves and simians, for example?

PMS: Because they wont, that’s why. They are weak- and none too smart. If we allow non productive- and destructive members of the human species an equal voice, why not simians? Besides, when the more base member of the human species go nuts, they won’t be burdened with having to answer questions about right or wrong. They only have to say ‘it’s natural and organic.’ That’s why the Arab world constantly makes reference to ‘finishing what Hitler started.’ They are only promulgating a natural and environmentally friendly world. The elimination of Jews, gays, the mentally handicapped and infirm can only serve to point out the commitment we have to a more natural world. Al Gore is leading the charge- and I, and my colleagues have nothing but admiration for Al Gore.

MHNN: Our time is up for now, Dr Sanity. Same time next week? We could finish our discussion.

PMS: Of course.

MHNN: Wonderful. Would you pass the box of Kleenex, please?

PMS: Of course.

MHNN: I think I’ll visit Carnival Of The Insanities. That always makes me feel more human. I laugh a lot.

PMS: Off the record- me too!

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